


I'm Scared, Pike

by hufflepuffsquee



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Gen, Hurt/Comfort, The boys need help and go to Pike
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-22
Updated: 2016-05-22
Packaged: 2018-06-09 23:35:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6928951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hufflepuffsquee/pseuds/hufflepuffsquee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A demon possessed Percy in a dream and he wasn't aware. Vax made a pact with the Goddess of death without meaning to. Grog held a sword that swallowed his soul. </p>
<p>These things mark you. Scare you. </p>
<p>A set of three interludes in the lives of our heroes as they seek guidance from the heart of Vox Machina: Pike Trickfoot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Scared, Pike

“I’m scared, Pike.”

It’s so late into the night it is nearly early in the morning and Pike had risen to the sound of a soft but insistent knock at her bedroom door.

Opening the door, she was surprised to see Percy standing there. Her surprise only increased, giving rise to fear, when Percy knelt on one knee and put a hand to her shoulder, looking at her so seriously it made her heart race.

Now she’s taking in the words, her expression softening into a concerned but supportive smile. “Oh, Percy.”

At her smile, he closes his eyes tightly and bows his head, as though he can’t bear someone looking at him with any kindness, as though he’s scared of that kindness. The usual tremor to his hands has ceased altogether, she notices, his hands still while it’s the rest of his body that is shaking. Pike has seen Percy’s hands in battle enough times to know what’s going on, recalling Percy’s finger hovering rock steady over the trigger of Bad News: Percy’s hands only steady in times of stress and fear.  

“Look at me,” she murmurs, reaching forward to tip his chin up with one hand. “Percy. Please.”

After a few moments he obeys, eyes opening slowly to look at her. She sees a shine to them, tears unshed but present all the same, the crease between his brows deep.

“I’m so scared.” He speaks again, a whisper, as though he’s frightened of his own voice. It occurs to Pike that he may well be, recalling how the magic of the demon had altered it before. “What if it isn’t gone? I don’t…. It’s out of me, we thought. With the gun. But I can still… How can I still Hex people? It doesn’t make sense. What if he’s still in me, Pike?”

“Would you like me to check for you again?” She murmurs gently, and he nods without taking his eyes from her, the motion quick and desperate.

She steps forward, summoning to her will the spell to enable her to see within him. One hand is resting on his chest, the other on her symbol and his head bows low again. She allows the light of Sarenrae to flow from her body into his, warmth moving through them both. In a few moments, the light fades and Percy raises his head to look at her.

“Nothing dark there, Percy.” She murmurs, looking at him seriously, her smile still in place her hand still pressed against the front of his nightshirt. “I promise. You are yourself.”

He nods, but still looks uncertain.

“Percy. You were manipulated by a creature that came to you while you slept, while you dreamed, and tricked you into making a promise that you didn’t understand. Once you understood it was in you, you rejected its presence and its purpose. That takes a lot, more than most people have in such matters. You’re free of it, you got yourself free, and we all helped you to do it. You can be trusted.”

“How can you be so sure?” His voice catches and tugs at her heartstrings.

“Because Sarenrae sees it. I trust Sarenrae, and I trust you.”

He smiles at this, giving another nod before pulling Pike into a brief hug, murmuring into her ear. “I need to thank you. For all you do for me and for all that you do for Vox Machina. Thank you, Pike.”

 She returns the hug, as tightly as she can before pulling away to look Percy in the face again. “I love all of you. You’re my family. You don’t need to thank me.”

“I know. But that isn’t going to stop me.”

Pike smiles and nods as Percy pats her shoulder and rises.

“I’m sorry for waking you, by the way. I simply… I needed…”

“You needed someone. I understand, Percy.”

“I… right. Yes.” He pauses. “Good night, Pike.”

“Good night. Sleep well.”

As she watches him go down the hall, she sees his fingers twitching and smiles. She really does hope he manages to sleep well, and sends a prayer to Sarenrae for him.

\--------------------------

“I’m scared, Pike.”

She turns, startled, from where she has been trimming the candles at one of the alters in the Temple of Sarenrae. If it isn’t done periodically, then the wax will overflow and drip into the feathers on the stone wings of the statue of Sarenrae that holds these candles in her upturned palms.

She sees, to her great surprise, Vax kneeling on the floor behind her. The rogue is sitting on his heels as though he wants nothing more than to be shorter than her, to be looking up at her. His face, for once, is open. Eyes wide, mouth downturned, fear spilling from his features as tears well in this eyes.

“Of what?” She asks, stepping forward to put one hand on his shoulder, the other to the side of his head.

Vax closes his eyes, mouth down turning even further as he leans into her gentle touch.

“I’m… A champion to a goddess that seems to terrify everyone. She terrifies me, I know nothing about her. I don’t know how to talk to a _goddess_ , I don’t know how to… To do any of this. I can’t understand any of my dreams. How do you… God, Pike, how can you do this?”

She smiles gently, sadness for him in her eyes.

“The Raven Queen is very different from Sarenrae, but people fear her because they don’t understand her. She guards over the moment when someone slips from this world to the next, that’s all. Death happens, and while it can be frightening, it isn’t inherently _bad_. And neither is she. She’s not an evil deity, she isn’t someone dark, Vax.”

He nods slowly, expression as though he’s having something confirmed. Pike had noticed Vex carrying a book about the Raven Queen, and suspects that Vex had already had a similar conversation with her twin. Pike hoped so, because she knew every time Vax could hear this would be helpful to him in a time when he needed the assurance.

“Do you need me to do anything?” She finally asks into his silence.

“I… Pray for me?” He doesn’t move, merely sniffs after he forces the words out.

“For you, or with you?”

A pause.

“With me.”

She nods, though he doesn’t see it, and bows her head.

“I lift this prayer to the ears of Sarenrae and the Raven Queen, here in this temple of the sun. The champion of the Raven Queen looks for guidance and reassurance, and I pray to both of you that you will allow him to see it. In himself and in me and in all of those we love, however you are able to. He is… an incredibly good man. Help to remind him that he has always been one, and always will be one. Sarenrae’s light on us, The Raven Queen’s peace to us.”

She ends the prayer, squeezing the hand that’s gripping Vax’s shoulder as she notices him shaking. She doesn’t say anything when the breath leaves him in a sob that’s quickly cut off, simply lets him stay as he is for the time being.

“Thank you, Pike,” He finally rasps out. “I… Needed that. And I trust you. I trust you more than almost anyone. I’ll… I’ll be okay. You’ll make sure I’m okay.”

“Of course I will. I won’t ever lie to you, Vax. I’m far too bad at it.”

He laughs a little, opening his eyes and letting the lingering tears fall in a steady stream. Pike brushes a thumb across his cheek, smearing a tear in an attempt to wipe it off. He doesn’t stop crying, nor does he move to leave. Instead he puts a hand over the one Pike has on his shoulder, giving it a firm squeeze.

“That means a lot. Thank you. We’d… I’d be in a bad place if not for you.”

“I care about all of you, I’ll do all I can to help every member of Vox Machina. You’re my family.”

“And you’re an absolute angel.” He says, letting quite a silence fall. “Could I… stay in the temple for a bit?”

“Of course you can, Vax. You’re always welcome here for as long as you need. Just… please, sit down on one of the pews. You can’t keep your knees on the floor.”

He nods and settles on a nearby pew, elbows on his knees as he stares into the distance and thought.

Pike returns to trimming candles, and when she finally turns around again, Vax is slumped and sleeping soundly. She smiles to herself, letting him rest. It might not be the most comfortable place for it, but he needs it. She blows out a few of the candles before she leaves, sending up another prayer to Sarenrae as she does. Not just for peace to Vax, but a thank you for him and his sister as well.

\-----------------------

“I’m scared, Pike.”

The words come out in great heaving sobs as Grog, massive though he is, collapses onto his knees and leans down to put his arms around her.

“I’m so fuckin’ scared. That sword… I didn’t know. It just was… I thought it was just really magical. I didn’t think it was bad, I didn’t think it could get into my head. I’m sorry. I’m scared.”

“Oh, Grog. Oh, oh, oh.” She murmurs quietly as she returns the embrace, her small arms around his head. As best he can, he’s buried his face in her shoulder and she runs her fingers over his scalp, trying to soothe as best she can.

It’s late, and the party had retired to Scanlan’s mansion hours ago. She’d been in her room, examining all of the personal touches Scanlan had left in it for her, finally pausing at the section dedicated to Sarenrae. She’d simply been standing there, breathing, when her door had opened

“It’s okay, Grog. It’s okay. You’ survived, you’ve made it. I promise, I promise.”

He nods, enormous body shaking against hers, and she feels like her heart is breaking for him.

“It hurt you, Pike… _I_  hurt you. And then it hurt _me_.”

“And I brought you back. I’m okay, and so are you. I’ll always bring you back.”

She’s never heard a half giant sound scared. Ever. She doubts that very few people have, in fact. But it’s clear as day to her that Grog is terrified and she’s willing to do anything to bring him back from this.

“You’re my best buddy, Pike.” He says, so quietly it’s almost not audible.

“And you’re mine.”

There are a few long moments of quiet, neither of them speaking while Grog’s sobs peter out. They fade, giving rise to sniffs and small hiccups. He sits back on his heels, giving her a smile through the tears and mucus on his face and she can’t help but smile back, looking up at him despite how hard he’s trying to be at her level.

“You’re as strong as I am.” He says, and she supposes that this transition is clear enough to him, though she’s not quite sure where it came from.

“With the gauntlets you gave me, I almost am!” She laughs and lightly punches his bicep, a playful one-two.

He laughs from deep in his chest and rubs the back of his hand across his nose with a massive sniff.

“Yeah, you are. But I meant in that other way. People talked about it all the time and I didn’t get it. But now you’re here and I do get it. And not just because of Sarenrae, even though I don’t get that really, either…” He trails off, brow furrowed in confusion. “Look, point is. You’re strong on the inside, too. Really strong.”

Pike smiles and throws her arms around his middle, squeezing him tightly.

“You are, too, Grog.”

There’s a long pause, then he speaks and she can feel it vibrating in his chest.

“What?”

She lets go of him and takes one of his hands in both of her own.

“You do things that are scary. Not like fighting monsters, those are a different scary. But you fought your uncle.”

“I needed you there.”

“But you did it.” She squeezes his hand. “And you stay with us. Grog, you started being strong inside when you told your family not to kill Papa Wilhand.”

His brow furrows and his nose scrunches up in a way that makes her smile with all the fondness in her heart.

“You know what. You’re right.” He’s grinning again, so huge it makes her laugh a little. “You’re always right, Pike.”

“Oh…” She shrugs and shakes her head. “Not always.”

“More than anyone else.”

“Feeling better.”

He nods.

“Wanna go see if Keyleth will let me borrow Fassbender’s circlet so we can play?”

He leaps up with a roar of “Yes!” before extending his hand to her. She takes it, gripping firmly as he pulls her up onto his shoulder. As he bounds through Scanlan’s mansion, an arm supporting her, she lifts a prayer of thanks to Sarenrae for him. No matter what, she’ll always be his buddy Pike, and she’s never been more glad to have met someone in her life.


End file.
